Welcome Fourth

We survived third year of marriage and it was hell.

No, not really. But I can guarantee you that it is not all sunshine and rainbows.

This date today is the first that I have no memory at all, like i completely forgot that today is a special day and that is highly unlikely of me. I’d always be the excited one to remember and to try make it special. I guess it was never special to begin with. I was never celebrated in a special way, no special gifts, not even a celebration with family. perhaps that is the reason why I subconsciously think that today is nothing memorable. Apart from the date that my life has changed. Commit my whole life to a guy that I thought would take care of me better that my parents would. Who would actually listens to my never ending rants and stories. Who would always make me his priorities and never procrastinate on how to make me happy. because simply, he, above anyone else would have known better on how to make me happy. As I am a very simple woman.

The skies breaks again, with thunders this afternoon. And so is my heart. torn between celebrating this very day or not and wonders why would I celebrate something that doesn’t even celebrates me?why go through the hassle?

People say the first Five Years of marriage is the toughest and being in my position now I’d love to believe that that my fifth year will be a whole lot easier. The thing is  I am surrounded by people who are always celebrated in their marriage, first five years doesn’t even seem so tough on them. then I ask, why is it so tough on me?

 

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